The Silver Bullet

A little over a year ago I was given a car by my grandpa. It was the most glorious 93' Ford Taurus. It has lasted and lasted despite my driving and I am sad to say that it is no longer in my possession. I got to drive it until it had over 300,000 miles on it. In case you are not aware, that is AMAZING for a Ford Taurus of that age. Unfortunately she had some repairs that were much needed that would have cost more than she was worth. So I towed her to a pick a part and watched her get dragged into a stock yard with other dead automobiles. I will miss the luxurious, comfortable, blue seating and the lack of A/C more than you could ever know. Thank you for the good times Silver Bullet and for getting me from point A to point B with a relatively small amount of sweat down my back in the summer. You made me proud.

The Nuisance

I have discovered that a 3 month old kitten is interested in everything. Everything in your home becomes a game or a toy. There is no exception. There are several things that I can get over relatively easily because they are also funny. There are a lot of other things that I will not ever really enjoy. This is a list of BOTH.

1. Pulling the toilet paper off the roll and trailing it down the hallway while running away from me.
2. Getting comfortable on my pillow to eventually work my head completely off of it.
3. Waiting to place herself between Curtis and I on the bed until we are asleep then biting my ear when I roll on top of her in my sleep.
4. Walking on the printer and making copies while we are not home. 
5. Chewing on the cord to anything plugged in that she can reach.
6. Basically any kind of biting or chewing on any part of my body.
7. Attacking my fingers when I am typing. 
8. Going behind the dryer over and over again and still being surprised when she gets stuck and needs help getting out.
9. Any kind of biting or chewing on bills, homework, or important student loan papers. ( I swear the most important papers must be the most fun to rip up)
10. 5 AM "LET'S PLAY!!!!" wake up calls.


I know there are A LOT more but I think I will give her a little slack and leave them out. If she wasn't so cute,  I would have definitely cut my loses ( in paper) a lot sooner. Like the first week. Lila is obnoxious. I was going to add a but there and make that into something nice about her but she bit my ankle earlier and I haven't quite forgiven her for that one yet. So that is why she is the nuisance.

The Trashy Fat Neighbor

I know that I am not supposed to have Lila in my apartment. I am very aware. But I know several people who also have not complied with this rule so I justify it.

The other day my neighbor was smoking outside my window two feet away from the clearly posted no smoking sign. The rule at my complex is that you have to smoke by the dumpsters. It is a courtesy to everyone who doesn't want their home to smell of cigarettes just by having their window open. This was not the first time this specific neighbor had been smoking in that location. Rather than turn him in to the leasing office, who would give him and anyone else listed on his lease a $100 fine, I decided to ask him from the window to move by the dumpster. My exact words were: "You are filling my living room with cigarette smoke. Can you please move by the dumpster?" He complied immediately so I assumed that my problem was solved.

I was wrong.

This neighbor was feeling spiteful and wanted retaliation. He saw Lila in the window and even though my neighbor directly below me has a cat that sits in the exact same location all day every day, he felt the need to notify my leasing office. I received a notice on my door the very next day telling me to remove the animal or vacate the property within three days. Naturally I kept Lila and her many toys at a friend's house for the apartment check to make it appear that she never existed and then brought her right back.

While I understand the desire to get back at me, I feel his response was petty and immature. But unfortunately for this trashy fat neighbor, I am more immature and more petty. If I see him smoke in that location one more time, I am going to report it. Have fun paying your fine sir. :)

And that is the story of the trashy fat neighbor man.